


I don't celebrate birthday

by thunderXfeather



Series: The Life on Moby Dick [1]
Category: One Piece
Genre: Ace hates his birthday, Birthday, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-18
Updated: 2021-02-18
Packaged: 2021-03-12 05:27:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,516
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29379927
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thunderXfeather/pseuds/thunderXfeather
Summary: "New year is a special day, we celebrate the birthdays of those who don't know or don't feel comfortable to tell, together with those who birthdays is in January. It is a bigger birthday party than usual."Seems to recall the party of last year, Ace murmurs, "I thought it was just a really big new year party."
Relationships: Fushichou Marco | Phoenix Marco & Portgas D. Ace
Series: The Life on Moby Dick [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2158200
Kudos: 10





	I don't celebrate birthday

**Author's Note:**

> Today is Renri (People's Day/人日), the 7th of the first month of the traditional Chinese calendar, which according to Chinese customs, was the day human beings were created, and therefore everybody's birthday. So, happy birthday everyone.

_1st of January_  
"Morning Ace, happy birthday." Thatch says while adding extra bacon into Ace's plate. The celebration won't start until noon, but Thatch knows Ace would never say no to some extra food. He therefore misses the blank expression follows by horror flashes across Ace's face. When he looks up to meet Ace's face after hearing a confused "What?", all he sees is bewilderment written all over Ace's face.

Marco, who happens to be walking to where the two of them sit, saw how Ace's face changed. Setting down his tray like he didn't notice Ace's strange behavior, the 1st division commander explains, "It's our tradition, yoi. To celebrate the birthdays in that month on the first day each month. We did that every month, remember?"

"Yes…but I never…" Ace nods but still looking confused and Marco thinks he knows why. "And new year is a special day, we celebrate the birthdays of those who don't know or don't feel comfortable to tell, together with those whose birthdays are in January. It is a bigger birthday party than usual."

Seems to recall the party of last year, Ace murmurs, "I thought it was just a really big new year party."

"Right, Ace was too busy with his murder attempts last year and didn't get invited. Didn't stop you from trying to literally crash the party though." Thatch grins at Ace, never letting the possibility of being set on fire deters his tease.

"Shut up!" Apparently embarrassed, Ace glares at Thatch, which is usually murderous and intense, like he can make the target spontaneous combust just by sight. But the effect of the glare is weakened by the pale pink appearing on Ace's face which runs all the way down his chest.

Marco decides to cut in before something or _someone_ start burning. "We asked before, but nobody from the Spade seems to know when your birthday is. And you never reacted to any birthday party. We kind of assume you don't know when it is." He pauses to look at Ace.

"So, you know your birthday? Do you mind telling us when it is? It's okay if you don't, yoi. We can still celebrate." That hollow and lost expression appears for a second again, Ace lowers his head and silently finishes his breakfast. Marco and Thatch exchange a glance before shrugging at each other and return to their meals.

"I don't celebrate birthday," Ace says when he finishes his last bite.

"What? But you participated in…"

"Not my birthday anyway. I should go to work now. See ya." He stands up and exits the mess hall, leaving two rather bewildered commanders behind.

That night, Marco finds Ace standing at the rear end of the deck, alone and far away from the party, silently staring into the darkness. Tonight is an unusual cloudy night. (Cloudy is perfectly normal weather but they rarely encounter any non-sunny weather after having Ace on board. The crew sometimes like to joke that maybe Ace is a sunny doll.)

What even more unusual is the direction Ace is facing. Marco noticed Ace's tendency to look at the East when he is lost in thoughts even before Ace officially joined the Whitebeard Pirates, he later learnt that Ace grew up in East Blue and has a younger brother living there. But tonight he is staring at the South. Before Marco can think further, Ace notices him and decides to break the silence.

"Sorry about this morning."

Still remembers how gruff Ace was during his early days on Moby Dick, Marco sometimes is still astonished by how polite Ace can be when he wants to.

"You aren't joining the party? I think some of the guys are looking for you yoi. Thatch even saves some food for you."

"Think I'm gonna pass this time. I don't mind celebrating others' birthdays. But it's different when it's for me." Ace shakes his head, voice lower than usual.

"You hate your birthday?" Marco prompts, mimicking Ace's postures and looks at the sea. Even with his observation haki, all he can see is the white wake Moby Dick is leaving behind.

"Don't see the point of celebrating the day my mom died." Ace glances at Marco and sees the knowing look on his face, he probably guessed what happened, part of it anyways, he is a doctor after all.

"I'm sorry to hear that yoi."

"She's the best thing in my life and I killed her."

"Complications during birth aren't uncommon. Whatever happened, it's not your fault."

"Not like that." Ace mutters but doesn't elaborate, and Marco doesn't push. The two of them fall into comfortable silence.

"So…you never celebrated your birthday? Not even with your brother?" After a while, Marco asks.

Thinking of his brother seems to lighten him up a little, Ace smiles for the first time that night. "Yeah…Not if I could avoid it. It's not that hard when you're living in a forest. The only things that matter are weather and season. Luffy always gets mad when he finds out though, saying we missed the opportunity to get a big feast for free."

"Sounds like a pirate talking." Marco smiles.

"Enjoys parties like one too, he never likes the booze though."

_5th of May_  
It is a very sunny day, clear sky with not even a thread of cloud.

"You seem to be in a good mood today."

"Luffy is turning sixteen today. He's going to set sail next year. I can't wait to see him again." Ace grins while replying.

_Next year 1st of January_  
"It's actually today, isn't it?" Marco asks quietly when he finds Ace alone standing next to the small patch of garden onboard the ship.

"…Yeah." Ace does not pretend he doesn't know what is being asked. Unlike whose blood he inherited, his birthday is not a secret he has to keep, his mother made sure of it with her life, he just doesn't want to let people know about it. He continues to stare at the red flowers before saying, "What gave it away?"

"You mentioned that Luffy will set sail once he is seventeen, you kind of implied it will be the first thing he does on his birthday." Marco shrugs.

"And Deuce knows when I set sail." Ace sighs, seemingly regretting sharing that with his former first mate.

"That, and I saw your reaction when Thatch said happy birthday to you last year."

"He caught me off guard with it. I never told anyone when my birthday is."

"Cause you don't want people to celebrate it." Marco's question sounds more like a statement.

"Yeah, the day I set sail was the only time I celebrated my birthday willingly." Ace strokes the crossed out S on his arm, a sad smile hanging on his face.

Marco blurt out. "You know, the birthdays we celebrate for our siblings aren't necessarily their actual birthdays. Some of us don't even know their birth dates. Some chose a day that they like to be their birthdays, could be an important day of their life or simply use their lucky numbers. Mine is actually the date I met Oyaji." Marco stops for a while before he continues.

"What I mean is it's more like a way for us to celebrate the fact that we get to meet each other, and we share each other's companies for another year."

"Never say no to any chance of partying." Ace's smile suddenly dims and Marco nearly misses what Ace says next. "Not sure I can say the same for myself though…And I still haven't figured out an answer…" Ace's eyes look lost, like he's trying to prove something but he doesn't know how.

"Answers to what?" Somehow Marco has a feeling that he's not gonna like the answer, but he asks anyway.

"Nothing…Just do you ever think that maybe the world's…better off without you? I mean mom would still be alive and- "

"Ace," Marco waits until Ace turns to look at him before continuing, "I can't say for your little brother, but I'm sure he will say the same thing to you considering how close you two are. We are all happy that we get to meet you. And even if the whole world thought you should’t exist, Oyaji would still accept you."

"I know." Ace nods with a sigh and Marco continues.

"I know you hate your birthday, and you blame yourself for your mother's death yoi. But it doesn't change the fact that we want to celebrate it with you, just like you're happy for your brother's birthday."

Ace stays silent for a long while, it kind of reminds Marco of another conversation they had years before. "…Thank you? I'll, err, be there tonight." He pauses before asking, “Do you think Vista will mind if I pick one of his flowers?”

“You have to ask him, although I don’t think he will mind.”

At dusk, Marco sees Ace throw a red flower, the same one he saw him staring before, into the sea, towards the South.

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry if the ending feels strange. The ending kind of gets stuck for weeks, but I'm not sure I can fix that, might as well post it before I think otherwise. All I have in mind was that Ace still hates his birthday and would doubt his existence, but he won't avoid the celebration completely like before.
> 
> It's my headcanon that some of the people in OP don't know their actual birthday and choose a day that they like instead. One of them is Marco who chose the day he met Whitebeard. And Whitebeard's probably the day he established the Whitebeard Pirate.


End file.
